Monday Morning Podcast 11-30-20

30-Noy, 2020
123 658 Ko‘rishlar soni

Bill rambles about losing his temper, lockdowns, and sleep sex.
Full Episodes of the Monday Morning Podcast: bit.ly/2nAzwGV
Full Episodes of the Thursday Afternoon Podcast: bit.ly/2mTA6Cy
Full Episodes of the MMP One-Shots: bit.ly/2oNClY2
Here’s the website! billburr.com
I was born a freckled child in a land far away during a much simpler time. I did well in school until it counted. As a freshman in high school I had dreams of going to Notre Dame and becoming a lawyer. By the time I was sophomore I was taking shop class and was considering getting into construction. I ended up working in warehousing and unloading trucks. Other than stand up, that job was the most fun I ever had.
I am now a stand up comedian. I do a couple hundred shows a year. And I enjoy the travel. I’ve done four hour-long stand-up specials: “Why Do I Do This”, “Let It Go”, “You People Are All The Same” and “I’m Sorry You Feel That Way.” I host a podcast each week called The Monday Morning Podcast. And I have an animated series on Netflix called: ‘F’ Is For Family.’ Occasionally I act in movies but only when they let me.

Fikrlar
  • That hamburger meat is free? 😐

    Victoria MorganVictoria MorganOy oldin
  • How humbled Ricky Gervais will be that Bill didn't mention his name as a favorite british standup 😅

    someonesomeoneOy oldin
  • Washington PILGRIMS instead of "Redskins"

    Dave MiddletonDave MiddletonOy oldin
  • I knew he would have to go back to the sexomnia thing at some point 😂

    1o29s231o29s23Oy oldin
  • "Let me go to my Twitter feed right now and just read you all the hate that I get"

    Vitor GraçaVitor GraçaOy oldin
  • Dentists aren't Doctors

    dekx räikkönendekx räikkönenOy oldin
  • But the cdc at first said to not wear masks?

    Reid DissingerReid DissingerOy oldin
  • Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzip.............................................................recruiter

    Raymond MaliangaRaymond MaliangaOy oldin
  • Fuck, I suffer from tinnitus too, how do you deal with it?? Do you take something for it? It pisses me of sometimes that fucking ringing on my ears !

    Daniel BottasDaniel BottasOy oldin
  • Vanderbilt woman kicker is cool and all, but I'd rather hear the "lady kicks baby" story.

    Key EpicKey EpicOy oldin
  • Man that dude mailed in just to get roasted 😂

    Sawid aytamaSawid aytamaOy oldin
  • Anyone know how to e-mail this clown

    William WaltonWilliam WaltonOy oldin
  • Someone tell Bill Burr he needs to take that truck out and drive it a good 30 minutes or so. Don’t just start the thing and let it run for a few minutes and call it good. This does more harm than good. Causes water to be introduced to the oil and doesn’t allow time for condensation to burn off from the valve train/ cam. Think corrosion and spalling. That is all. 😊

    jonnydwolfjonnydwolfOy oldin
  • Also the Great Reset isn't a conspiracy Jon Carry just got done talking about it the other day .

    Jeremy EnriquezJeremy EnriquezOy oldin
  • Low-key the same people you call a pussy for not wearing masks are the ones telling us to wear them . I don't mind wearing masks . I actually love places like Japan who wore masks on the regular just to keep germs to themselves. That being said if masks were so detrimental to the outbreak why are the same people who tell us to wear a mask also got caught not social distancing and not wearing masks.

    Jeremy EnriquezJeremy EnriquezOy oldin
  • Almost the anniversary of my dads death - nothin can make me appreciate life more than this! Thanks ol billy freckle nuts!

    Buhlawkay Da BoyBuhlawkay Da BoyOy oldin
  • Welcome to Sports Center 🤷‍♂️

    TwobarpsiTwobarpsiOy oldin
  • I just had to leave this here. A 40 minute read, but for you Bill, 120. Thank you for the laughs over here in the UK. file:///C:/Users/slowroll/Desktop/harmthangood.pdf

    Peter KinnerPeter KinnerOy oldin
  • I love how in some these podcast he doesn't even have much to say lol. Still entertaining though

    Bobby BBobby BOy oldin
  • 39:22 Bill Boognish?

    AceMalarkyAceMalarkyOy oldin
  • He would release Thursdays podcast late after they hinted his return in mandalorian.

    WOOBAWOOBAOy oldin
  • I hear you on the garage thing! my grandad used to say " why do you have a garage if you still work in the dirt and filth" you can work in the dirt outside!

    EricTheDesignerEricTheDesignerOy oldin
  • Burr ya sly bastard...back in the mandalorian

    The TankelaThe TankelaOy oldin
  • I love old airports,small airports all of that shit -Bill Burr

    usef walidusef walidOy oldin
  • Looks like our red hair ballsack is back on The Mandalorian. Looking forward to thay.

    Ha VuHa VuOy oldin
  • Since joe rogan moved to spotify, Bill should add a camera to the podcast and start having some guests and fill that void on youtube lol.

    Trip Dapperson Jr.Trip Dapperson Jr.Oy oldin
  • I'd like to see Bill play Good Times Bad Times....??

    Joseph WayneJoseph WayneOy oldin
  • Plot twist: CDC told people not to wear masks for the first six months of the pandemic.

    carley northcoastcarley northcoastOy oldin
    • Yeah, after the # of "cases" dropped.

      chris kazaamchris kazaam25 kun oldin
  • Regarding sleep walking I am little surprised that Bill doesn't know about Mike Birbiglia. Mike is a comedian and has a serious case of sleep walking, he almost killed himself once.

    completenalayakcompletenalayakOy oldin
  • Love the fake love and respect for Joel.

    khromkhromOy oldin
  • I love when he does the NFL song😂

    Jordan ARJordan AROy oldin
  • Trip the female and than get her number later 🤣✌

    mark veniciomark venicioOy oldin
  • I predicted your Pats to beat the Cardinals Bill. Lol. Also predicted 49ers over Rams

    Justin PettitJustin PettitOy oldin
    • Okay virzi

      Jack MurphyJack MurphyOy oldin
  • Swear every one of these is exactly the same 😅

    D DD DOy oldin
  • Around 14:00 Is he talking about Jake Paul?

    A High FerretA High FerretOy oldin
    • Dur

      Jack MurphyJack MurphyOy oldin
  • "Bill is against organized religion and believes we should go back to the gold standard for our currency. None of his opinions are based on any sort of reliable information. He tends to go with his first thought, *because reading makes him sleepy* ." 🤣

    Jeff BakerJeff BakerOy oldin
  • "He's been aggressive on line since 2008 & half" i like Bill's laydee voice.

    CJOKCJOKOy oldin
  • How to I send mr burr a message for him to read during his podcast?

    ExplorerExplorerOy oldin
  • You gorgeous bastard... it's a pleasure to work hearing this man.

    Roberto PugaRoberto PugaOy oldin
  • You need a fucking swear jar for every time you flip over bullshit, but your swear jar penalty should be a hundred bucks worth of 10 dollar bills that you hand out to the fucking homeless because you are rich and don't have real problems

    Cliff WebbCliff WebbOy oldin
  • Lonnnng time stand up fan, love F is for Family, new-ish podcast listener. Where do I go to write in for discussing topics? I've listened to a bunch of the ranting compilations and such by fan pages and there's a few emails people just have me like "what the actual fuck are they thinking!!"

    Tempest God GamingTempest God GamingOy oldin
  • @billburrif you want solar panels let me know I can get you them for free on your house and it'll save you a ton of money you mentioned something like that in one of your podcasts and my company will hook you up

    kincade hallockkincade hallockOy oldin
  • Bring back Sherry's berries

    Lance YOXTHEIMERLance YOXTHEIMEROy oldin
    • 😐

      Jeff BakerJeff BakerOy oldin
  • "...who won't care what we put in the water supply"... 😆 I want a daily calendar with daily quotes from Bill...

    Miss SoMiss SoOy oldin
  • Phonetic: *Tin-ah-tus.*

    G ArtG ArtOy oldin
  • I direct my anger at inanimate objects especially when I’m at work repairing cars. The guys at work think it’s hilarious and we all get a good laugh. Anger is a normal emotion. Just direct it constructively. If Bill wasn’t angry he wouldn’t be half as funny 😄anyhow

    Nick MNick MOy oldin
  • "Oh darn" Darnold? LOL noooope

    Thomas BranchThomas BranchOy oldin
  • That poor girl. I bet she is getting trolled so hard cuz of a girl playing football with boys. I would give her mad respect if she was playing defense or a QB or anything but a kicker. Why can't the men play with men and the girls play with girls. It works for everybody. If girls want to play with the boys then we must treat then like a boy. Let's keep it 100!

    dmob420dmob420Oy oldin
  • Bill needs his Orwell 1984 hate minute.. Snapping convulsely here aswell

    daslo lourencodaslo lourencoOy oldin
  • How does Bill not get kicked out of TX?

    David LawsonDavid LawsonOy oldin
  • you're wrong Bill, cdc clowns lie we don't need no stinkin' mask

    Frank HardieFrank HardieOy oldin
  • How do we send in things for billy ballgag here to read?😂

    fuaad Sfuaad SOy oldin
  • 36:55 the zip recruiters crack me up 🤣

    Tracy StephensTracy StephensOy oldin
  • Keep killin it

    Peseti TukutauPeseti TukutauOy oldin
  • “I have huge respect for Joel Olsteen” Now THAT’S funny. Bill you are an effin C. xxx

    Gonzo LenzGonzo LenzOy oldin
  • Your the man Bill Burr, keep fighting the good fight Bro!!!

    jason simonsjason simonsOy oldin
  • That's how I roll... Anger

    Michael KimmingsMichael KimmingsOy oldin
  • CDC stated "dont wear a mask"..then ""wear a mask" ..then scientists state ..it doesnt help..but you need to wear a mask..

    Lapis2200Lapis2200Oy oldin
    • I listen to the scientists...ehhh the inventor of the PCR test who calls Mr. CDC Fauci an idiot.

      chris kazaamchris kazaam25 kun oldin
  • CDC just changed the quarantine time -now its 7 days ,,maybe 10,,,the dont know...

    Lapis2200Lapis2200Oy oldin
  • You deadnamed The Washington Football Team - watch it! 🤣

    Garrett GGarrett GOy oldin
  • the dundies homy

    kimberly andersonkimberly andersonOy oldin
  • You need to pray bro lol

    Cody AllenCody AllenOy oldin
  • The Paul-Robinson fight was ridiculous. Nate is like 5’8” tall and 180 lbs max. He is in his late 30’s and a basketball player. Paul, while he is a UZworld personality, I believe is an amateur boxer who is professionally trained. I believe he is 6’2” tall and like 220lbs Of course he is going to win. Why would they rag on Nate? I am no boxing expert but would that fight be really legitimate given the height and weight differences? Was it an exhibition? That’s why they have classes right? Not a fan of boxing. It is too constrained. I can appreciate it but MMA is more like real fighting. Boxing is a legitimate sport but as far as capturing real street fighting essence, it’s MMA all the way. But as they say, you cannot argue taste.

    Kenji MapesKenji MapesOy oldin
  • I forgot the upside of my birthday being on a Monday. I got an episode of the MM podcast to listen to!

    BostonianBostonianOy oldin
  • How am I? Good. Just had some hot chocolate.

    Karl JohansonKarl JohansonOy oldin
  • I LOVE IT WHEN THINGS BOTHER BILL BURR 😂😂😂😂

    Johnny CheungJohnny CheungOy oldin
  • Time is flying when you read so many ads.

    Johnny CheungJohnny CheungOy oldin
  • Fuck. Sold Out everywhere. Somebody give Bill a night in San Antonio!

    Kevin BarlowKevin BarlowOy oldin
  • Loved ya in Mandalorian , sorry though your in prison now.

    Tony StarkTony StarkOy oldin
  • West of Dallas neat little rock climbing park and lake. Mineral Wells State Park. Worth the trip for a little outdoor hike!!!!

    Bret HeinemeyerBret HeinemeyerOy oldin
  • Hey Bill and others did you know that the loss of life world wide has gone down each year from 1.15 seven years ago decreasing to 1.12 last year. And 2020 looks to be the safest of any decade/year with a massive drop to 1.10 world wide as of November 2020 But we won't have final numbers until February 2021. This is happening for two reasons first CCP/CHINA is not giving out accurate numbers and second the Plague didn't kill anyone in excess meaning those expected to die did and those expecting to die also took better care of themselves. So you have z 4.6% chance of death from Covid-19 out of 100,000 people but you also have that same rate compared to 2017 numbers world wide. All I'm saying Bill is do the numbers yourself it's simple 4th grade math.

    Trav2016Trav2016Oy oldin
  • Tried to get tickets for Dallas show they sold out in like 45 secs.........

    Michael HertelMichael HertelOy oldin
  • Wait didn't fauchie say that you didn't need a mask and that it was pointless?

    Schecter 7Schecter 7Oy oldin
  • The guy who wrote Bill the email about masks...must have forgot that Bill went off on the whole city of Philadelphia.

    Robert DavisRobert DavisOy oldin
  • Analytics are for nerds. Run the damn ball.

    J MacJ MacOy oldin
  • I feel ya. So many things bother me. I blow my gasket daily. But at least I can laugh about it.

    Jeremy DockterJeremy DockterOy oldin
  • We love you out here in Oklahoma dawg stay real keep doing you and I know that's hard to do wit cancel culture always breathing down your neck but don't change brother..

    Slick SmokeSlick SmokeOy oldin
  • Keep it coming. Love ya, billy❤️

    A KA KOy oldin
  • That blindside block infuriated me. The nfl is getting so pussy.

    Speedy28GonzalesSpeedy28GonzalesOy oldin
  • Spot on in regards to the garage. 100% agree. If it's a big enough garage and you don't have an extra room for it, a bar and a dart board is OK to put in, other than that, garage stuff only.

    PJ B.PJ B.Oy oldin
  • You know Bill if you just tried mushrooms it might open your mind up to a joint or two

    Busch HawgBusch HawgOy oldin
  • When bill said he was snapping left and right first thing i thought was "maybe his on his period"

    AverageAverageOy oldin
  • If you’re serious I might have something that works! For real though.... I’m a tattoo artist in Denver,Co. tattooing always chills me out. If you ever want to try it let me know hahaha. I know this sounds crazy and all but fuck it what do you got to lose? There is just something soothing about torturing someone who wants it haynahaha

    Bob HolbrookBob HolbrookOy oldin
  • Anger is normal dude. You are just blessed with more than some.

    Conrad ZeelieConrad ZeelieOy oldin
  • Anger is a secondary emotion which masks the real emotion Bill.

    Dave AndrewsDave AndrewsOy oldin
  • If you go to Texas and focus on pulled pork, you're missing out. Brisket, man. Come to NC for pulled pork.

    Kris LongKris LongOy oldin
  • I think you should stream on twitch

    almighty347flyalmighty347flyOy oldin
  • They're called The Football Team. The Washington Football Team. Fucking hilarious.

    Tim JohnsonTim JohnsonOy oldin
  • Anyone know if ol' Billy BlazeBalls has ever talked about his drum setup? Curious to know what kind of kit he plays.

    TeenageWindTeenageWindOy oldin
  • Always a pleasure listening to you, laughs don't come cheap this year.

    Jason ChislettJason ChislettOy oldin
  • tinnitus. in what capacity are you going to go on the road? with covid still a thing

    helen readyhelen readyOy oldin
  • My gawd damn ears ring too.

    UncleBuZUncleBuZOy oldin
  • Y'all see the meme that compared the fight to the scene from sanford and son?

    Hawk TawkHawk TawkOy oldin
  • I love bill burr again. Glad to hear him tear that anti masker a new one

    DulceEt DecorumEstDulceEt DecorumEstOy oldin
  • Tin night us tinnitus

    Smeebles RonsonSmeebles RonsonOy oldin
  • Just saw the movie were you flexed your acting chops...nice try...how you gonna walk up to chris and al at a bar... asking them if they know what time it is ... like you gonna be the mic that's gonna wipe they ass and put them to bed...I didn't by it... your mouth is sharp. However, stick to comedy.😁🥞🍻🛀💖

    OptimusRhymz 222OptimusRhymz 222Oy oldin
  • Please add video to the podcast. Need to see your facial expressions😂😂

    dylncbdylncbOy oldin
  • The opening 2 minutes... Me (and apparently everyone else) in a nutshell.

    BrendanBrendanOy oldin
  • Bill and chappel are top of the food chain

    GIMIEEE15GIMIEEE15Oy oldin
    • And they have compromised themselves to a disturbing degree to reach it

      Billy Renee HillBilly Renee HillOy oldin
  • does snl one time

    Shovel FaceShovel FaceOy oldin
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